Is there ever an acceptable use of the “n” word?
The simple answer is NO
There is never a situation or circumstance when the “n” word can be used.
Let me explain
I have experienced three recent occurrences where the “n” word used in my presence, at work. In all of these situations it was used by white people and in all of these situations it was used while recounting a story of its use.
“So what’s wrong with that? It wasn’t aimed at you.”
If this is your question, you really don’t understand how offensive this word is to Black people. This word is far more offensive than the “f” word or the “c” word, even when these words are coupled with the word “black”. The reason is the history of its use and the continued meaning of its use, especially if it is used by white people.
Its origin comes from the Spanish and Portuguese word for “black”. The word ending “er” has a deeper meaning than a racial slur. Its use is to identify Black people as less than human, similar in use to the word “untermensch”. Interestingly the term “under man” predates the Nazi use of the term and was likely the origin, as it was first used by the American author Lothrop Stoddard (who was also a Ku Klux Klan member) in the title of his 1922 book The Revolt Against Civilization: The Menace of the Under-man.
As you can understand the “n” word is a grossly dehumanising term, one which every Black person in a white majority nation would have at worst been called to our face, or at best heard another Black person being called at least once.
There is a popular use of the term with an “a” instead of “er” by Black people, largely in African American vernacular in an attempt to reclaim the use of the word. Personally, I don’t understand why anyone would want to repurpose such a dehumanising term in a way that is still far less than positive in its use. Regardless of the use of the “n” word with an “er” or “a” ending, this word should never be used by anyone who is not Black and because of its historical context, never by white people under any circumstances.
If you think you are not a racist then think about this. Have you ever used the “n” word in your head but not spoken it out, if yes then you are a racist. There is a saying “The mouth speaks what the heart is full of”, this is particularly applicable when your tongue has been loosened by alcohol. Here is a video of a person who would consider herself “not racist”, who still even now considers herself “not racist” and whose parents would also consider themselves “not racist”. Yet when drunk used the word over 200 times.
Here is another person who so desperately wanted to use the “n” word but used “black” instead because even in her drunken state she realised that she should not speak it out.
And no, not even if you are singing song lyrics should you ever use the “n” word if you are not Black, not in front of others, and definitely not in the presence of Black people.
Even a famous historian and a BBC journalist who have used the ’n’ word in recounting its use in historical texts and a news report have recognised their error an sought forgiveness for its use and al least Lucy Worsley committed to never using it.
In conclusion there is never a justifiable reason for using the “n” word and it should be entirely eliminated from vocabulary, globally!